THE ARGUMENT THAT CHANGED MY LIFE FOREVER By Behcet Kaya

 

While attending a Moorpark College English class, we were given the assignment to write an event in high school that changed our life or one that we would never forget. I wrote the following:

I was born in a very small village in rural northeastern Turkey. My village was situated at the lower levels of high mountains, the northern side was surrounded by gentle rolling hills. The higher elevations were covered with pine and spruce trees; the lower levels close to outer edge of the village grew oak and willow trees and tall grasses.

In spring one can observe on slopes patches of hard snow here and there, while sheep, goats, and cows graze freely. Violet and yellow wildflowers covered the fields. Crystal clear melted snow water came down from the higher elevations. Occasionally on the hills and higher elevations mist rose up from the sun hitting the wet grass. A pastoral scene that even to this day I still miss.

When I was fourteen my father and I had an argument that changed my life forever.

I can still hear his words as clearly as if it was yesterday.

“Your loyalty belongs only to meeeee. Your responsibilities are only to this family. You do what I tell you. Act like a man.”

The words are still buzzing in my head as I write this. My mother was the only friend I had. She was afraid to interfere. I had just come back from attending the animals. The smell of manure on my work clothes was strong. I did not even have my morning breakfast. The slanted rays of the morning sun pierced into the living room, as my father paced back and forth.

He continued, “When I was your age, I had to look after my brothers and sisters.”

I was listening and afraid to say what I thought. If I did, that would mean taking a blow. I ran to my room which I shared with my brothers. My mother and father were arguing, her voice reached to my ears. She was crying.

I was looking for my valise, and gathered my suit, which I paid for. Whenever I wore my suit, my father would make me take it off, and would find a chore for me to do. I was so proud of my clothes that everyone in the village thought I was attending Lychee (high school). I was pretending I was.

The whole argument started because I had asked my grandfather last night to persuade my father to allow me to enter military school to be an officer. It was only two weeks ago; I came back from Ankara. I worked there the whole year as a laborer under the supervision of my aunt’s husband. The money I earned I sent back to my father to help out the family. My workplace was next to the military school. I saw the officers marching. How I dreamed of becoming an army officer.

I gathered what was mine. My wallet, and my raincoat, again purchased with my own money. I took off my work clothes, washed then changed into my suit I was so proud of. I took my valise and left the house.

I have chosen to leave, because if I stayed, I would never be permitted to leave the village again. I was determined to never come back to this place. Instantly, I thought about my mother. I knew she was going to be worried, but it could not be helped.

It was about five miles from my village to the city of Siran. I walked as fast as I could to reach my destination. There I found a lorry going to Erzincan, an ancient city in eastern Turkey. My journey was uneventful. The driver was a nice man who asked me questions as to where I was going. When I told him I was running away from home, he understood my situation, and give me valuable information.

In Erzincan, I purchased a train ticket to Istanbul. I was filled with fear; fears about strange places, fears about encountering people who pick pocket, fears of running out of money. And there was an overpowering fear that towered over all of my other fears, that my father would inform the police and make me return home.

I had never felt so alone in my life. I wanted experience the western way of life, see Europe, go to college, but how? I have just enough money to last me a month. I was worried about finding a job. And the thought of not being able to see my younger brothers and sisters and my mother made my stomach hurt.

The details of my arrival to the big city are another adventure. I was lucky to find a relative who had a construction company. I was immediately employed by my relative. While I was working, I was attending classes to learn English. There I made another daring decision to leave the country, because if I did not, my father would come and find me and that would mean my desire for the western way of life would be a pipe dream.